Help Me With This Addiction...

So I've mentioned a couple of times about this game called "Destiny Online". Well I think I am getting a little too hung up on it. The trouble is that I have friends on the game, people that I have stuff in common with, and things like that. The bad part is that I feel like it is driving me away from everything else I care about. I get irritated with everyone when they bug me while I'm playing this game, I've hardly payed any attention to anything else but this game since before December. 

Its so HARD! I don't know how to stop. I've tried logging off fora  few days but I always feel like I'm going insane like I NEED to play or something, its just so maddening. I don't know what to do now, I have never been in this situation before. I have always been able to walk away from anything (almost) in the past. 

I don't even know where to start. =(

Church Swimming Activity!

Yeah it was this big church thing I had yesterday. We had this huge dinner, sloppy joes, and other stuff it was so busy and there were a ton of people there.  My church rented the pool for 2 hours and we had it all to ourselves, got to swim for free. 

Its a lot colder when you swim at night. there were  lot of freezing people on the slide line ha ha. 

I went down on this swirly slide, I was going to fast the second time i actually hit the bottom of the pool and got a bruise on my ankle, lower back and elbow. I hit the bottom pretty hard ha ha. I was out of it sort of for like 3 seconds. 

It was fun watching all the little kids play in the pool and splash around and stuff, so cute!. I've always loved watching kids play i the pool. I remember when my nieces were little babies and we took them to the pool ha ha. 

I was swimming in my shorts for a while but then they just began to get in the way so i took them off and just wore my swimming suit alone. I normally don't like to show m legs if i can help it, it makes me feel a bit self concious.  

I was craving mint ice cream so bad afterward ti was funny. 

It felt good when i went into the locker room and used the hot shower, thats always good when you're freezing from swimming in the evening haha

Bad 20th Birthday...

Not something you want to hear from someone that had their 20th birthday yesterday on the 4th. but in all honestly it SUCKED! I would just like to take a moment and tell yo what has been happening to me the last couple of weeks.

Okay so 2 and a half weeks ago my mom and dad went on a choir tour. I had 12 days of piece without having to worry about my loud, annoying, jumpy (sorry if that's mean), nieces. to say the least I really enjoyed it. This Tuesday they got home and i discovered that my mom and dad both got the Swine flu while they were gone, My mom is still feeling the effects because her immune system has trouble taking that sort of thing. My week was pretty normal, the same old same old. I played Destiny Online, watched a few movies chilled back and relaxed, etc. 

If you told me that the Swine Flu would prevent me from having a normal birthday a few months ago you would probably have me staring at you with a crazy look. 

No I did not get the Swine flu
But my mom getting over the swine flu made it so I had to basically throw all of my plans out the window for my birthday. I wanted to go places and see stuff. 

I didn't want to go without my mom because I just wouldn't be able to enjoy it without her plain and simple. I just settled fora  movie and fireworks yesterday and decided to just quit thinking about all the stuff I could have done. but in all seriousness I am really disappointed and sad that my birthday didn't turn out better, I've ad better birthdays in the past. 

I know the world does not shift in my direction when I want it to. i never as for anything, I never want anything, I'm not a really wanty kind of person that thinks everything should go her way. I just wanted this ONE thing to go in my favor. I am grateful for the fireworks those were fun and I got a video (which I'll post later). but I was a little melancholy the whole day, and bored which no one should feel on their 20th birthday. :(

sometime in the future I'd love to go to an amusement park, the museum, go shopping, go to my favorite restaurant, etc. I think that would more than make up for the sad, dull disappointment that my birthday was. 

I'm glad Xanga is here, this is one of the few places I can actually express how I am really feeling when I really need to express it. I always keep my feelings to myself most of the time, its nice to vent.