Uncertain Ground

Work was alright today. I made a lot of ice cream and that helped the time to fly past. Usually I am horribly bored, so it's been a nice change making ice cream on the weekend. Before I was making ice cream on Tuesday mornings, waffle cones on Thursdays and I would help customers on Saturday. Saturdays can be busy, but not until after 2pm. I have liked the change the past two weeks, even if I have less hours. Right now I only do waffles on Thursday and ice cream on Saturday. I still get to help customers when I have the time of course. I'm also looking for another job, but that will take a while I think. I actually applied for Macey's grocery store late last night. I hope I get that cashier job.

We got a new manager a couple of weeks ago. His name is Heber. I don't know much about Heber yet and it makes me kind of nervous. I've had a bad manager before and every time I get a new one I'm always afraid history is going to repeat itself. Not knowing much about my new manager is uncomfortable. I hope I learn something new about him at our next work meeting. So far all I've deduced is that he is kind of strict, but that isn't very helpful. In fact is just makes me nervous. I am feeling very uncertain right now. I hope he turns out to be a good manager. He is my 4th manager. I can always quit if he turns out to be bad for me. I just have to keep reminding myself that. My mental health comes first. I've been working at Coldstone for too long anyway. I really need to write about my work history soon. It has been a crazy ride.

Snap Back to Reality

I was checking my wordpress to see if I forgot to post anything from there on here. Sometimes I don't feel like posting on here. I found this post from almost a year ago that talked about these two interviews I had last year in November.

One of them was at Dairy Queen, and the other was for Bath & Body Works.

The post said how confident I was about how I did for my interviews. I just HAD to write about this. I have a completely different view now. I did so many things wrong.

I had my Bath & Body Works interview after my Dairy Queen interview. I was so excited about my Bath & Body Works interview that I let myself get distracted. I think I might have even talked about it in my Dairy Queen interview which was stupid. Besides that blunder I came in looking like a mess to my Dairy Queen interview. Needless to say I didn't get the job at Dairy Queen. I couldn't have been more obvious that I wasn't really into working at Dairy Queen. To be honest, I was relieved. I don't really ever want to work with ice cream ever again if I can help it. That job wasn't a great fit for me.

I had my interview at Bath & Body Works a couple days after I think. I'm not entirely sure how far apart they were, or if they were on the same day. That part is a little fuzzy to me. I made sure I looked nicer than I did for my Dairy Queen interview and was pretty confident. I think that the reason I didn't get the job was because I didn't have enough sales experience. I don't know if I'll try again this year because I can't say I have any more sales experience than I had last year.

So, looking back on that was funny to me. I just had to write about it. It's amazing how much I have realized since last year. I still have a long way to go though of course. I got kind of a late start in the world of employment. I have no idea what I'm going to end up doing or even what I want to do right now. I'm sure I'll figure it out though.

Diamond Rose

I was hit with inspiration yesterday and felt like creating a poem about Cara (Darik's wife). She really is someone you would expect to read about in some pretty song or poem. She is beautiful inside and out. I showed this poem to her and both she and Darik loved it.

Anyway, so today I just made a brief trip to the mall and took the bus to Macey's grocery store to pick up an application and get a chocolate vanilla ice cream cone. Later Laura made chicken and cheese enchiladas. She also made lemon bars, but they aren't done quite yet. I'm planning on filling out the applications I got today and also finishing the ones online. I'll turn the ones that have physical copies in on Monday.

Trying Again

So last week I decided to go on the HCG diet again. June was a bad month to try and do it and I had to wait another month before I could try again. Your body get's used to the HCG drops after about 5 weeks, or it starts to anyway. When that happens you start losing weight slower. So that is why you do it every other month. It get's pretty annoying eating pretty much the same thing every day for a month so even if I didn't have to do it this way I probably would.  I am doing my two day load, I'm on my 2nd day now. I am pretty sure nothing will come up at least for a  few weeks that will stop me from following it perfectly this time.  I am really looking forward to losing more weight. I am also starting my yoga and Palates routine again to help a little more.I am on my 2nd day of my load. Pretty much for the first two days you are on HCG you make sure you are never hungry. You can pretty much eat anything you want for the first two days. After the first two days it becomes harder though. I think I explained it in a previous post. I went to a buffet we have here, this place called "Chukarama". It's a really good place to eat. I went there for my load today. They have really good food. I had a little bit of everything. I started out with potatoes, corn, a scone, and something else that slips my mind right now.  I had ham, a roll, and some peas for my 2nd plate. After that I had a pretty big salad.  For dessert I had strawberry shortcake, and strawberry frozen yogurt. All around it was a pretty good meal. I usually don't eat that much, but when you are loading it's a good thing.

I've been kind of neglecting my jogging, I know that isn't good. I have some motivational issues sometimes and that is pretty much the biggest thing that has stopped me from making more progress than I have made this summer. I will become good at running eventually, I just have to fix some personal issues first though. I love to run a lot it just takes a lot of effort and dedication.  I am positive that sometime soon I will be able to get into it for real. I did go jogging a little bit a couple of weeks ago but it wasn't much. I was just figuring out a good routine, how much I should run, etc. 

I got contacted by my counselor at Vocational Rehab a couple of weeks ago, and also got sent a letter. Vocational rehab is a place where people with disabilities can go and get job counseling. I haven't seen my counselor for a while, probably in a couple of years, which I'm not supposed to do. I managed to get away with it this long somehow.  Anyway, we were informed by letter that I should probably set up and appointment with my councilor. We did that sometime last week.  What happens at vocational rehab is you basically discuss what you think you want to do for a job and your councilor can make suggestions, tell you what you should probably do and probably should not do as well. We talked about possibly finding me some kind of computer related job while I am at school working towards my degree in English. We came up with the idea that I would probably do good in some kind of technical support job, helping people solve problems, something like that. I'm pretty sure my first job will have SOMETHING to do with computers that is for sure. I'm not quite ready to start working with a lot of people, for now it's better for me to find a job where I don't have to work / interact with a lot of people. That kind of job would probably overload my brain and make me really stressed.  it was really nice seeing my councilor, even though I was skeptical at first, and I didn't really want to see him all that much it turned out okay. I'm not sure if I will see him again any time soon but we will see.  I have a feeling that in th end I'm going to end up finding my own job, I'm not sure though.

it has been raining a lot the past couple of weeks. It seems like every other day the day either starts out cloudy, and then gets sunny half way through, or the exact opposite. I have really liked the rain though, because it has been really hot inside my room sometimes. I have been finding myself wanting to get wet a lot lately.  Yesterday when I went to Vocational Rehab, before I left it was only raining a little. Once we got to our destination however it was raining like crazy and I got my wish finally while we were running to the building, I got completely soaked. by the time we got inside, both me and my dad were both dripping wet. It felt really nice quite honestly, to me anyway.  I hope it rains like that again soon.

So you know I have been working on the Star Trek episodes lately. I am on Deep Space Nine now, on season 6. I am almost on season 7. I have been spending a lot of time lately just watching Star Trek. I have always been a fan but never really watched the episodes as seriously as I am now. Star Trek is something I never get tired of.  It has been nice just watching it again. I was really young when it was on TV. My favorite character from TNG is Data, my favorite character from DS9 is Odo, my favorite character from Voyager is 7 of 9. I haven't watched the original series or Enterprise yet. Honestly I'm not sure I will ever watch Enterprise, it just doesn't have the same feel to it.

Besides this stuff that has been happening, nothing much has happened the past couple of days. i should probably note that I added some of the entries I did not post to Xanga. I had them on google docs, but I didn't get them posted on Xanga, I was feeling a bit lazy. I have most of them up now but I stil have a few more July entries to add to my blog.

I guess this is all for now. I will make sure to keep you updated more now that I have my energy back. If I forgot anything I will add it in tomorrow's entry.

Superhero

I won’t lie, if I could choose any occupation even the ones that aren’t possible in a normal world I would choose a superhero.  I’ve always been a big fan of superheroes my whole life. Superman, batman, spiderman, supergirl, green arrow, the flash, etc. I could name so many I am familiar with. I grew up watching shows like X Men, and the old superman cartoons. I’ve never had a chance to read any comics but I still know who a lot of superheroes are.

If I could have any power it would either be shapeshifting, or wind manipulation.  I would prefer to have both if I could though.

I’ve always loved to help people, it is in my nature. Despite the fact I have some social problems and have trouble being around people sometimes and talking to them I have a natural urge to help people and I just want them to be happy.  I don’t think I will have my social problems for much longer, I have already gotten better. Once I can overcome my social problem I plan to become a force for good in this world and use my writing and my future expertise in psychology to help people live better lives and possibly change the world. 

Words are powerful things and if i can learn how to use them to my full advantage then I will be able to help a lot of people. I’ve always loved to write, I write everything from songs to poetry to short stories. I also love to read a lot as well and often find inspiration from a lot of authors.

I love finding out how the mind works which is why I am choosing psychology for my 2nd major. I want to learn how the human mind works. I know if I learn enough I can use the knowledge to help a lot of people.

This is my solution for not being able to become a superhero. As long as I have a way to help others even without super powers I will be happy.

You don’t need to be able to be like Superman to be some sort of hero. :)

I'm back

Hello everyone! I have returned. I know I'm back about 10 days earlier than I thought I'd be. 
You have probably been wondering where I have been and what I have been doing. 

Well almost a month back I got a reply to a gaming job that I wanted. It was a spot to be a GM in the game. I thought I could do it, but a few days before that my fan in my computer started acting up. I tried to do the job and ended up resigning from it instead. That was the original reason for me taking a break from xanga. The second one happened when the Olympics were on. I decided to take a break from xanga for the Olympics. Plus I just needed a few weeks away from xanga to think about stuff. 

I started going into the yahoo chat rooms a week ago. I am usually in Christian chat #1 or #3. I've also been spending time doing that. I go under the alias peppermint_magic. 

The Olympics were enjoyable. My favorite sport was figure skating. All my favorite people won their competitions. So many records were broken it was very cool. 

My family had been planning to actually go up to Canada when the games came there but we ran into financial problems a year or so back. Last time I went to Canada I was 9 years old. My grandma and Grandpa lived there. 

Valentines day was pretty normal. I just got chocolate, and cookies from my neighbors. We celebrated my brother's birthdays in Feburary. They're both older than me. They were within a week of each other. 2 years apart. 

Anyway so I guess that's all for now.

The More I Think About it the More I am Confused!!

Have you ever been in the situation where someone asks you what you want to for a career path you think you know what you want to do and you start talking about it but the more you talk about it the more you think of other stuff you want to do? It happened to me the other day.

I was talking to a job counselor the other day and we were talking about my future plans. I started by saying that I wanted to be an english teacher but as the conversation progressed I slowly changed to a job where I could work with computers. So now I have plans to do something with computers like be a technician or a web designer, or something like that. I never thought I didn't know what I wanted to do until I started talking about it it was so weird.

I now realize that I should have considered the fact that my interest don't match up with m abilities that much. The only thing that i'm really interested in and that I'm able to do is stuff with computers. I have a  hard time learning but when it comes to stuff that has to do with computers it just makes sense. I never once thought about the fact that I'm better at stuff that has to do with computers than I am with writing. I love to write and I love to read, I though that I would want to be a writer but now I think I just want to be a blogger, a professional blogger on top of the tech job I choose. I think that's perfect for me. 

Anyway no other thoughts on this right now. ha ha.