Simon's Cat

I love the Simon's Cat cartoons on Youtube so just in case you've been missing out I'll show them to you. 
This will make your day so much better.

Here is the official website.
http://www.simonscat.com/

Youtube
http://www.youtube.com/user/simonscat#p/u

Addiction.

Addiction, and getting into things has never really happened to me often. I think sometimes that something went  wrong (or right) before I was born.  Its always been really easy for me to just walk away from stuff. 

I came close when I started playing Destiny Online but my mind intervened again. My mind seems to intervene with logic and explanations every time I'm about to become addicted to something. I seem to be able to think my way around anything. I think my logic is my best friend really.  When I'm about to get addicted or really into something that wont really do me any good or benefit me negatively or nothing at all its like this switch turns on that tells me "Its time to get bored of this.", or "Okay time to go to something else."  you wouldn't believe how much that comes in handy.

Websites, games, even TV shows never really have gotten to me very much.  I guess I'm kind of a "Do this a few times than move onto something else and maybe go to that later again." kind of girl.

I uninstalled the game.

So this game that has been occupying most of my time since last December and has kept me from Xanga "Destiny Online". I finally uninstalled it! It is the one main reason why i haven't been off of Xanga mostly until Halloween but I have finally had enough, and now I'm blogging about it to tell you that it is completely gone off of my computer for good. 

I've felt a lot better since a  couple of days ago when I started going on Xanga again. I feel like I'm actually doing something with my life again, I feel like I have a life again in general. I definitely find Xanga to be productive and worth my time. Writing has always been my best talent. I feel like I am exercising that talent here, and doing good.

This is overall a positive thing for me

Why Xanga is so Great.

Here I go again, one of my spur of the moment thoughts that I just have to get out.

I have been thinking about this for about a day or so and it just came up inside of my head again.
I have been on many different blog sites, experimented and found they were all crap compared to Xanga. I've never gotten why such blogging sites such as wordpress, and blogger are so big and popular. the more I think about it the more I realize they are just crap.

There are a few things that Xanga has that I don't think those wanna bees will ever have.

1. Custom look
(you don't have to fork out a bunch of money just to customize the look of your blog, the colors, pictures, etc. That is probably one of the best things I love about Xanga.)

2. You get noticed a lot more
(You get noticed a lot more on Xanga. I think the other competition is maybe too big to ever accomplish this. I don't have to fork out money to be noticed, advertised, etc. I want to be read, I want to be noticed, I want attention. Xanga gives me that attention. I do not care if it is only inside of the permitters of Xanga or not I just get noticed and I love it.)

3. Xanga is a good place to meet good people!
(Xanga is awesome because you can find cool people pretty easy. Its not hard to find someone that is really interesting and fun to read.  That is something else I never quite accomplished on other sites.)

4. Xanga is experienced
(I think Xanga existing for so long has done it some good, a lot of good in fact. They know what we want and they are good at giving us what we want. I an really happy with the service here)

5. Xanga is easy to navigate and to understand.
(Xanga is a fresh change from other sites I have been on. I was always a bit confused by the navigation and working of other blog sites. I see them as too confusing. I don't know about you but this is the way it was for me. I understand how to work xanga and how to do everything, I love this about Xanga.)

6. Xanga listens to its members.
(I think Xanga values the opinions of its members more than other blog sites.  Maybe other competitors are just to big?)

I'm sure I missed some, so what other reasons do you think Xanga is better than the others?

Sometimes I wonder if I have a Bad Deal.

 

You know, sometimes I have this feeling like I'm being cheated out of something by staying in the USA. A lot of people say that the USA is the greatest place to live. I've been thinking lately and considering the possibility that maybe I am being cheated out of a better experience. I know that living in the USA is pretty nice but I'm sure that it is not for everyone. I often think if I would be better off in another country.

I have lived in the USA for my whole life and up until about 2 years ago I never really thought about the fact that maybe the USA really isn't the best place for me, maybe I should travel, maybe I should learn a language, or several languages and travel the world. either way I just don't really feel, and have never really felt like I am supposed to stay here my whole life.  I feel like if I do I will be cheated out of several things that otherwise I would have gotten to experience.

I love meeting new people, going to new places, eating new food. I don't feel like the USA is the best place to live, at least for me its not. We all have our destined place or places we're supposed to live.

I want to live in Japan, France, Australia, Germany, lots of places.  I do not want to live in just one country.

Potluck Dinner Failure...

So my church does this potluck dinner thing after church once a month or so. We just did a time switch with the wards (NOTE: if you're not familiar with the LDS church you might have to look "ward" up).  We're divided into wards. Our ward is usually pretty good about bringing food. I'm in the singles ward (its exactly what it sounds like, a ward full of single young adults only).  

This week we failed however for some reason. It probably had something to do with the fact that since we are no longer the last ward to get out of church anymore we have to wait for the other wards to finish Sunday school and such and people just forgot. Or maybe it was a lack of communication.

I find it totally funny though. It also seemed like people had sugar on the brains today. Most of the food was dessert *gag* after all the candy I ate yesterday it didn't seem very appetizing to me at all. 

There were only about 6 actual food dishes (non-dessert food). It was pretty sad. Somehow we  successfully distributed the small amount of food to people by some miracle. 

Yeah, so this time the potluck dinner was really quite a failure, it was still nice though, I got to talk to a lot of people.

Yes or No on Trick or Treating?

I've made a habit of going alone the last 3 years. it has always been fun for me because i have a  very very big route. But last year it just felt awkward. I think I finally outgrew it last year. I was glad to be home when it was all over.

What year did you grow out or what year do you guess you'll grow out of Trick or Treating?

Its funny how when we are younger we tend to say that we will never grow out of it. I was actually surprised when I was halfway through my route last year and suddenly realized how ridiculous at 19 I probably looked Trick or Treating alone. Maybe it was just me. Maybe I should start taking some kids. I don't know.

I Still Dream About Eric...

So I had this really good childhood friend named Eric. We were friends ever since the first grade. We got into a lot of fights and stuff like that and didn't get along ALL the time but we were still good friends. 

Around 8th grade or so he began to have feelings for me and me for him. We liked each other until my senior year in high school when he couldn't take the fact that my parents hated him anymore and wouldn't let us go out on a date at all. He moved on with this girl named Brittany, we got separated, I still love him, and I still dream about him almost EVERY NIGHT! 

Its not that hard to deal with but sometimes it drives me nuts. I know I still love him, that I can not deny. But seriously these dreams are driving me crazy. I want to get over him but don't know if i can. I have not talked to him in almost 2 years, which is absolutely crazy! I know its not logical to still love someone when you haven't even seen or talked to them in over 2 years. Maybe I just think I love him? I am not sure.

He got married to that girl named Brittany, that is why i stopped talking to him. She was getting a little hostile, I hate her, she does not deserve him, I hope they broke up, really hope they broke up. I'm a little afraid to try and call him again...

I really hate things like this.

Halloween Party

So I went to this halloween party yesterday it was pretty fun. Every year my church throws this halloween party. we get a bunch of people together and watch movies, do a dance with a professional DJ, we have food and stuff. Lots of people usually come. It was really fun yesterday.

For the food we had chips and salsa, pizza, caramel apples, chocolate fondue with bananas,  home made root beer, apple juice, and some other stuff. It was really fun. We had a couple of movies playing in 2 of the churches rooms. One was Signs, I don't know what the other one was I forgot ha ha.

We had the church gym made into a dance floor, we had a  professional DJ, and the lights were awesome, and we had that mist stuff that they spray at dances. It does cool things to the lights. 

I went with some of my friends, there were probably around 400 people there it was nice. The dance went until midnight. I'm glad I got to go this year I didn't get to go last year. We had this huge costume contest and people won movies and stuff it was pretty nice. The costumes people were wearing were hilarious, and awesome. People are so creative over here.  I was a princess, I'll have to take a  picture of my costume and put a picture up later.

I ate so much candy yesterday night, I'm glad I'm not going Trick or Treating anymore. After you turn 20 it gets a bit awkward ha ha. 

Anyway I guess thats all.

What am I Cursed or Something?

My whole life I have felt like this. Like I have this unbelievably strong curse on me that keeps me from happiness and drives people away from me. I try so hard, I don't know what to do. My eyes, my body in general feels cursed. Everything about me, I just feel like I bring nothing but bad fortune to everyone and I'm a burden, and a  nuisance, and a  bother to everyone around me. 

I'm not writing this to tell you about this curse or any of its components except for one. The fact that my dental work has been cursed since the beginning. Something went wrong before i was born, something with my genetics and I am missing most of my permanent teeth. I have most of my baby teeth left. I've been desperately trying to keep them intact. I have never had front teeth, ever. I wear a retainer with teeth on it. I lost 2 other teeth a couple of years ago, the one on either side of where my 2 front teeth would be.  So I am already missing 4 teeth. Today I went to the dentist, everything seemed fine, but 2 other teeth on the top have to be pulled out now. I want to scream WHY ME WHY ME WHY ME!!!!????  I already feel very self concious about everything that has to do with my mouth, teeth and all. This just really nails 2 more nails in my self esteem coffin.

you cant imagine how I am feeling today.

Another element of this curse that I guess I have. Is that i have been developing wrinkes on my forehead since i was in 7th grade. They are very noticeable, and one of them is particularly deep. It is right across my forehead and i have 4 that are becoming more noticeable.

Every day I ask myself. Who would want a girl like me? But still I try so hard to keep the people I love without success. 

Its complicated, this curse I have.

Xanga Birthday...

August 9th was my xanga birthday, I was reading the Harry Potter books again so I completely forgot!  Wow I can't believe I've been on Xanga fora  whole year! Seems like just yesterday i signed up on Xanga and started blogging. I had been on blogger and Word Press before i was on Xanga. When I came here i found it was and still is the exact thing I was looking for. A lot of other sites I have liked have gotten boring to me but Xanga never has. True, on occasion I will forget to write fora  couple of weeks because I am reading a  book or occupied with something else but my heart is attached to this place like glue and I allays come back.  

You guys are my family in a lot of ways, I feel so at home on Xanga and feel like I am heard. I am looking forward to a lot more time on Xanga, I hope this site will be here for a  long time.

Oh yeah and today is my nieces birthday, she is turning 8 years old

My Sister's Wedding in California

So a couple weeks ago was my sister's wedding up in California. 

http://www.myspace.com/strawberry
That is her Myspace music page. 

I still can't believe that it has been 2 weeks since i went to that wedding already. A lot of things were great but a lot went wrong as well. I'm almost sure you'll understand why I haven't been writing in my blog for almost a month after you read this. 

So we left on a not Friday morning, we had to rent a huge SUV to carry all 8 of us in the car. I was envious of my brother and sister in law who got to ride in a plane. the car drive was 11 hours long and miserable.

My nieces sat in the back seat with me, I was on the far left, they were sitting next to each other. The car ride was not enjoyable to say the least. We kept o having to bug my nieces to leave each other alone, there was a lot of screaming and hitting, the older one seems to be really sensitive to annoying stuff, even if her younger sister so much as poked her she would have  a fit.  My mom and sister (other sister) got into frequent fights about who was disciplining them right and who was not.  My uncle was just quiet the whole time listening to books on tape or something like that. There was Coldplay playing in the car a lot of the time.

I thought i would go crazy. I wanted to be in China the whole 11 hours I was in that miserable car with all the tense feelings and reactions and arguments and discussions, etc. I wanted to be nowhere near everyone else. I don't think I was alone in this.  

Of all things to happen in the midst of all the torment of the car drive I got a really bad bloody nose, just what i fear every time i take a  long car drive, or go to a place where the air is really dry.  It was hard not to panic, and to freak out, my body really wanted to. Luckily for me we got to a nearby Arby's and had lunch and I took care of it. I had toilet paper with e in the car just in case but all the stress was making it worse i think. At some point i actually got a glob of paper stuck up m nose and had to carefully blow it out without getting blood everywhere. that was very uncomfortable.  

We must have been at Arby's for an hour, my mom and sister got into a few arguments about how each other were taking care of the kids actions. It was hard to get everyone back into the car, It had been 4 hours since we left at this time. I could tell everyone was already very tense and did not like being in the car for that long. 

I can't remember what point it as at but sometime in the course of the car drive we made the kids move apart from each other, we put the older one up front in the middle between her mom and my uncle.  We watched movies the rest of the way pretty much on my dad's laptop computer. We stopped at the gas station a few times and got treats and stuff on the way. 

We go to the hotel about midnight California time. There was nothing particularly amazing about our hotel to say the least, it reminded me of an apartment complex, and not a hotel.  our room was average (we had 1 room for the guys and one for the girls). each room had 2 queen sized beds, they were hard (but the pillows were good). there was a desk, and an entertainment center with cable or satellite TV. there was  bathroom, I really liked the shower.  We were hungry at this point so we got some hamburgers from Jack in the box, a local fast food place. I really hate hamburgers but i ate mine because i was hungry. We got to bed about 2am in the morning California time. I slept better than i thought i would, and got 8 hours of blissful sleep.  We all took showers (I brought some good smelling soap). afterwards we all pulled our purple and black dresses on, whichever color we were all wearing, and left for the church. We were still all tense from the car drive and were not very eager to get back into the car even if it was just for 10 minutes.  We had to pack my brother and his wife in the car this time, so people had to sit on people's laps and such. 

the wedding was at a Unitarian church somewhere in Studio City.  the air conditioner decided not to work for us that day, so we had to go the whole day without it it as miserable.  When we got there we put up all the decorations, my sisters colors were purple, black, and silver. It took us a few hours to do so.  there were 2 or 3 photographers that were snapping pictures everywhere.  I hate cameras so i tried to avoid them as much as i could.  My sister helped with her own decorations as well, we all had fun attempting to stick the balloons to the ceiling. We forgot to fill them up with helium , instead we accidentally filled them up ourselves it was funny when our sister reminded us of this.  

My sisters dress was so pretty! it was strapless and white, it had silver stars all over it, the top of the dress had silver pretty designs on it, I absolutely loved it to death. I got to help her put it on and stuff, it fit her perfectly.  Her hair was purple and had some silver and black steaks in it to go with the colors it was absolutely beautiful.  She let me war her tiara the whole time we were there (I'll take pictures later of it).  

billy Corgan the leader of Smashing Pumpkins was there as well, and some other famous people i cant remember. 

I followed my sister around for a while than sat down in my seat in the chapel and waited for the ceremony. it was very hot in the chapel at this time due to the lack of air conditioning. there were a lot of people present. it was about 15 minutes later when the wedding started. There was music playing from both my sister and billy Corgan as we waited.  

When the moment arrived i got a  surge of excitement and got quite a nice view of her walking down the isle with my dad. the walkway was white, not sure what it was but it was sort of slippery, I'm gad she didn't trip.  she looked so pretty walking down the isle. and even prettier when she got to the front of the chapel.  they told each other their vows, and some stuff, the wedding was pretty normal, there were some funny moments, it wa cute, the reverend was really interesting, it was nothing like a normal wedding, the kind that you see on movies or TV. It had a good deal bit more humor and was less... churchy.  All the rest of my family members are Mormons so this was a change for me, I'm so used to having my family members getting married in temples.  I don't quite know how to describe the wedding of my sister besides that i had more humor thana normal wedding, it was interesting. 

After the wedding we set up the reception, the limeade, the cake and cupcakes, the food, it was mostly finger food, the decorations, etc. the wedding reception was quite hot, actually by the time it took place it was getting cooler outside so we opened al the doors. it got better in about 2 hours later.  People coversed, and kids played outside, my sister took pictures outside with her friends and family, i took a few pictures with her friends, she has interesting friends. though some of them smelled like cigarette smoke and other stuff, i didn't really care though.  People just hung out and talked for hours and stuff like that, Later in the evening we cleaned up, and packed all the presents. My sister gave me some butterfly decorations, they kept on tangling up it was annoying. I gave up after a while. my feet hurt after a while, i could hardly stand walking anymore after doing so after for so long.  The night wasn't hot at this point, it was rather cool, the temperature was perfect. After everyone left we went to my sisters house after cleaning up. 

My sister had a male cat, i naturally had a n allergic reaction about 10 seconds after i entered the apartment. the cat also let off a smell that made it so i could not breathe, well not as good anyway.  i was more than happy to leave and get my lung capacity afterwards slowly, though it took me 2 days to get it back all the way.  

we went back to the hotel and went to sleep, the car drive, we just watched movies the whole way back, we did go to the beach on the way back it was really pretty. It took us forever to find parking though.

Anyway so that was our trip.

Help Me With This Addiction...

So I've mentioned a couple of times about this game called "Destiny Online". Well I think I am getting a little too hung up on it. The trouble is that I have friends on the game, people that I have stuff in common with, and things like that. The bad part is that I feel like it is driving me away from everything else I care about. I get irritated with everyone when they bug me while I'm playing this game, I've hardly payed any attention to anything else but this game since before December. 

Its so HARD! I don't know how to stop. I've tried logging off fora  few days but I always feel like I'm going insane like I NEED to play or something, its just so maddening. I don't know what to do now, I have never been in this situation before. I have always been able to walk away from anything (almost) in the past. 

I don't even know where to start. =(

Church Swimming Activity!

Yeah it was this big church thing I had yesterday. We had this huge dinner, sloppy joes, and other stuff it was so busy and there were a ton of people there.  My church rented the pool for 2 hours and we had it all to ourselves, got to swim for free. 

Its a lot colder when you swim at night. there were  lot of freezing people on the slide line ha ha. 

I went down on this swirly slide, I was going to fast the second time i actually hit the bottom of the pool and got a bruise on my ankle, lower back and elbow. I hit the bottom pretty hard ha ha. I was out of it sort of for like 3 seconds. 

It was fun watching all the little kids play in the pool and splash around and stuff, so cute!. I've always loved watching kids play i the pool. I remember when my nieces were little babies and we took them to the pool ha ha. 

I was swimming in my shorts for a while but then they just began to get in the way so i took them off and just wore my swimming suit alone. I normally don't like to show m legs if i can help it, it makes me feel a bit self concious.  

I was craving mint ice cream so bad afterward ti was funny. 

It felt good when i went into the locker room and used the hot shower, thats always good when you're freezing from swimming in the evening haha

Bad 20th Birthday...

Not something you want to hear from someone that had their 20th birthday yesterday on the 4th. but in all honestly it SUCKED! I would just like to take a moment and tell yo what has been happening to me the last couple of weeks.

Okay so 2 and a half weeks ago my mom and dad went on a choir tour. I had 12 days of piece without having to worry about my loud, annoying, jumpy (sorry if that's mean), nieces. to say the least I really enjoyed it. This Tuesday they got home and i discovered that my mom and dad both got the Swine flu while they were gone, My mom is still feeling the effects because her immune system has trouble taking that sort of thing. My week was pretty normal, the same old same old. I played Destiny Online, watched a few movies chilled back and relaxed, etc. 

If you told me that the Swine Flu would prevent me from having a normal birthday a few months ago you would probably have me staring at you with a crazy look. 

No I did not get the Swine flu
But my mom getting over the swine flu made it so I had to basically throw all of my plans out the window for my birthday. I wanted to go places and see stuff. 

I didn't want to go without my mom because I just wouldn't be able to enjoy it without her plain and simple. I just settled fora  movie and fireworks yesterday and decided to just quit thinking about all the stuff I could have done. but in all seriousness I am really disappointed and sad that my birthday didn't turn out better, I've ad better birthdays in the past. 

I know the world does not shift in my direction when I want it to. i never as for anything, I never want anything, I'm not a really wanty kind of person that thinks everything should go her way. I just wanted this ONE thing to go in my favor. I am grateful for the fireworks those were fun and I got a video (which I'll post later). but I was a little melancholy the whole day, and bored which no one should feel on their 20th birthday. :(

sometime in the future I'd love to go to an amusement park, the museum, go shopping, go to my favorite restaurant, etc. I think that would more than make up for the sad, dull disappointment that my birthday was. 

I'm glad Xanga is here, this is one of the few places I can actually express how I am really feeling when I really need to express it. I always keep my feelings to myself most of the time, its nice to vent.